Fake. Or genuine?

This is gonna be another one of my ‘disappointed with world’ rants. Bare with me.

For a week now, my closest friend – let’s call her Purple (her favourite colour) – has been on the receiving side of so much damn drama. I just don’t get it. She is one of the sweetest girls I know and always, I mean always, tries to avoid confrontations. So for someone who shies away from massive drama; for someone who apologises even when she’s not in the wrong, to be going through such petty issues, is quite big.

I was shocked when she reached out to me. She was accused of not being a good enough friend. Like what? My reaction exactly.

Friendship is not about damn expectations. It’s not about not doing ‘enough’. That is not what the word means. Friendship is love and happiness. Friendship is understanding and bloody well accepting every little flaw and quirk in your friend. For all you know, the things that come so easy to you, could be equivalent to moving mountains for your friend.

I swear, these days friendship is taken too lightly. It’s so disappointing that if a ‘friend’ does something for you its out of some duty and with reluctance, using the term ‘I have to’. NO! You don’t bloody have to! That. Is. Not. The. Point.

Purple and I always have this talk about doing things out of pleasure instead of duty. Making sure that our intentions are pure before we do anything for anyone. She gets it. It’s not that hard.

But that’s the world now. So damn fake. For so long, I just stayed away from people, for the exact reason of lack of genuinity. I was tired of the competition girls think they have to have in their lives. I was mentally exhaust of all the fake smiles and the superficial air kisses.

Recently, I started going out more, if only to get myself out of the depressed funk I found myself falling in. I though I had found genuine people. People I could relate to. But yet again, I was unpleasantly surprised by the ugliness behind what seemed like true, honest people.

I just don’t get it. I don’t get the whole ‘I did this for her, so she should do this for me’. Like why? Do you only give to get? Yes, every action does have a reaction. And yes, you do get what you give. So just imagine, the same person who you expected to return the favour does for you with the same intentions, like oh I don’t know, invite you to her party just because you invited her to yours and not because she genuinely wanted you to be there, how would you feel?

So, if you are reading this, and you find yourself doing things out of duty instead of merely for the receiving persons happiness then stop right there! Purify your intentions. It won’t make a difference to the other person; they have no idea what you’re thinking. But you do. And once you do something simply to put a smile on another persons face, trust me, you are going to feel a thousand times better about yourself. So be genuine. Simply for yourself.

Originally written on: 10 December 2016

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