Cool, calm and definitely not collected

It’s crazy how one question can open a tidal wave of emotion within you. For days I’ve been cool and calm and collected. Or so I thought. It seems that having your dreams shattered does take a toll on your mental health; or in this case mine. Trying hard to be okay with the hand I’ve been dealt does not actually mean I’m okay. And I’m not okay. Maybe it’s the hormones or maybe it actually is just mood swings; I don’t know. All I do know is that I’m glad that I’ve got it all out of my system. Feelings I didnt even know I had surfaced and many questions in my ever active brain were finally answered. I guess letting go sometimes actually does help. That’s the thing with life; like a train, it moves on. It’s just up to us to decide whether we’re settling down for the ride.

Originally written on: 26 November 2014

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